not trippinig not sad

all my life i wanted one thing. i had a small glimpse of it. it was nice incomplete but i was satiated. physically.

I felt like then i learned that the most you could ask your was a happyness Goal.

When the period ended, I saw the fineness of the moment as a reason why the gift was so good. I reconginsed the moment as ominously unrealistic.

(Dont text me hoe.)

A blessing none the less. Because it taught me, that the happyness of achieving was only worth receiving. And receiving was best accentuated by safety. (Safety like the idea that you could find what you lost.) Shitwasntmine to begain wit

(eX-since-you-waited lol)

But that after the 3rd act the movie never looks up for protagonist like me.

We have our projects. Offen we have materials But were always trying to find a safe space. To write, to create , to design.

Sometimes i feel like when i run away im trying to look for heaven while creating eden behind me

... Like moving towrads heaven with plans to create eden when i get there

interesting juxpostion . Mabye looking for god to bring him heaven. Lol then i peace out